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Image by TOMOKO UJI
Writer's pictureVictoria Shilongo

What Does It Mean to Be Born Again?

A Step-by- step Guide for New Believers


Imagine your life is like a smartphone. Over time, it gets filled up with apps you don’t need, photos you’d rather forget, and maybe even a few viruses that slow it down and mess with its performance.


You try to delete things, but somehow the phone is never as fast or clean as it once was. Now, what if you could hit a magic button that resets the entire phone back to factory settings? All the junk disappears, the glitches are gone, and it’s like you’re holding a brand-new device.


A woman giving her life to Christ Jesus through Baptism through immersion of water

Being “born again” is a bit like that reset button. It’s God’s way of taking everything in your life—all the mistakes, all the pain, all the baggage—and clearing it all out. When you’re born again, you’re not just improving things here and there; you’re starting fresh, restored to the pure, uncorrupted version of yourself that God originally created.


It’s a clean start—a chance to live life with God’s guidance and His Spirit within you, helping you navigate each step. You’re back to the “default settings” that God intended for you before the world added its junk.


Let me Help You Understand and Break It Down Further

Think of your life like a whiteboard. Over the years, people write things on it—labels, expectations, even lies you start to believe about yourself. It gets filled with things like “not good enough,” “mistake,” “guilty,” “fearful,” and “unloved.”


But when you’re born again, God takes an eraser and wipes it all clean. He restores the board to a blank, pure state, and then He starts writing new things: “loved,” “forgiven,” “strong,” “chosen,” and “purposeful.” That’s what it means to be born again—it’s a reset, a chance to start over with Christ Jesus writing your story.


My Testimony of How Being Born Again Changed My Life

I’ll be honest: before I came to Christ,  I was living in darkness without even realizing it, my life was chaotic filled with poor choices, I was constantly searching for something to fill the emptiness I felt inside.


The truth is, I was living in ignorance—a spiritual blindness that keeps you from seeing the truth about yourself, about God, and about the purpose He’s designed for you. In 2 Corinthians 4:4, it says, “The god of this world has blinded the minds of unbelievers.”


I thought I was living freely, doing whatever I wanted, but I was actually trapped, walking through life with no real direction or understanding. Completely unaware of the deeper spiritual reality all around me. Life is Spiritual after all.


The Bible says, “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge” (Hosea 4:6), and that was me. I was perishing on the inside, not from any physical danger, but from not knowing the truth—the truth that could set me free.


I would try to numb myself with wild parties, substance abuse, and jumping from one reckless situation to the next. I was living in a cycle of bad choices, feeling lost without a purpose. I remember going out night after night, thinking that maybe this time, I’d find something that made me feel whole. But each morning, I’d wake up feeling more empty than before.


On top of that, my mind was a battlefield, literally. I used to struggle with overthinking, to the point where it felt like I was drowning in my own thoughts. It wasn’t until later that I learned I was actually under spiritual attack—specifically, a form of oppression that’s sometimes called the “octopus spirit,” which tries to cloud your mind with confusion and anxiety. But at the time, I didn’t understand any of that; I just felt trapped in a mental fog.


Then came the moment I decided to surrender everything to Jesus. I wanted a new life entirely. And that’s exactly what God offered me. I asked Him to make me born again, but I didn’t actually know what it meant at that time. And let me tell you, that decision changed everything.


Did all my problems vanish overnight? Of course not, in fact, in some ways, things got harder. I faced more spiritual warfare than before. But now I was equipped and prepared. God filled me with His Holy Spirit, giving me strength I didn’t know I could have. The Holy Spirit is the best gift we receive as believers of Jesus.


I started to make intentional efforts to get to know Christ Jesus as my personal Lord and Savior, my friend, and my guide. I prayed, I read Scripture, and Jesus began to to fill every empty place in me.


Over time, my desires started to shift. The things that used to pull me in—parties, immoral sexual and reckless behavior, substance abuse, alcohol addictions—they just didn’t have the same appeal to me anymore. 


My mind began to clear. That overthinking that once felt like a prison? It was replaced with peace, a kind of clarity and calm that only comes from God. For the first time, I had a sound mind. I could think without feeling overwhelmed, and I felt free from the chains of overthinking, worrying and anxiety that once kept me in bondage.


Finding Purpose and Meaning

But that wasn’t all. In this new life, God didn’t leave me to wander. He gave me a purpose. I began to wake up with a sense of mission, like each day is a new adventure waiting to take place.

God had a plan for me, and discovering that plan gave my life a richness and depth that I’d never experienced. My life wasn’t about empty thrills anymore; it was about fulfilling the unique calling God had placed on my heart.


Being born again brought meaning to my life in ways I couldn’t have imagined. I realized I am not just here to take up space; I am here with a mission, a “quest” if you will. And each day, I get to partner with Jesus Christ in fulfilling that purpose. There’s a joy and a satisfaction that comes from knowing you’re walking in alignment with what God created you to do.


The Upgrade

I like to think of my life now as an “upgrade.” I repented of my sins and left behind old bad habits and I received something so much better. God upgraded my heart, my mind, and my spirit. He took me from living a life that felt like an endless loop of searching and emptiness to one filled with peace, purpose, and so much fulfillment.

A woman rejoicing after giving her life to Christ Jesus

Being born again has nothing to do with becoming perfect. It has to do with letting God transform you from the inside out. It’s surrendering the things that once held you down and letting God lift you up to a life you could never have achieved on your own.


And while there will still be struggles, and challenges, and even attacks from the enemy, but the difference is that you now have the Holy Spirit to guide, strengthen, and protect you.


The Holy Spirit is your best friend that will never leave you.















Yes, there will be challenges. Spiritual warfare is real, and sometimes the journey gets tough. But here’s the thing: The grace of God will meet you in every moment. He’ll give you peace when the world feels chaotic, strength when you feel weak, and joy that goes beyond circumstances. You’ll be walking with Jesus, and there is no greater adventure than that my friend.


So, If you’ve just become a believer who is committed to fully surrender to Jesus Christ, or you’re thinking about it, here are some fundamentals to help you get started on this journey:


1. Understand What It Means to Be Born Again

When we say "born again," it means you've made a decision to leave behind your old life and start fresh with Jesus. It’s a spiritual rebirth. Jesus explained it like this to a man named Nicodemus: "No one can see the kingdom of God unless they are born again" (John 3:3). Being born again means you’re on a new path, with God leading the way.


It means your past is forgiven, you have a clean start, and the Spirit of God now lives within you, guiding you. You’ve entered a new life where your identity is now rooted in Jesus, and nothing can separate you from God’s love (Romans 8:38-39).


Where to Start:

  • The Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John) are a great place to begin. They tell the story of Jesus’ life, His teachings, His death, and resurrection.

  • The Book of Psalms is also wonderful for understanding prayer and worship, especially if you’re going through tough times.

  • The Book of Proverbs offers practical wisdom for everyday life.


A woman praying by communicating with God as a daily spiritual practice.

2.Spiritual Warfare: Preparing for Battle as a New Creation

Being born again is a beautiful beginning, but it’s also the start of a spiritual battle. When you step into your new life in Christ, you enter a realm where spiritual forces are actively at work.


As Ephesians 6:12 tells us, “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.”


Demons will be out to get you but fear not, you have been given the power, the authority and dominion to overcome them, (read Luke 10:19).


The enemy will try to pull you back into your old ways, using fear, doubt, and discouragement as his weapons. But as a new believer, you have the power. God has given you His armor (read Ephesians 6:13-18), and you have the Holy Spirit within you to guide, protect, and strengthen you. Don't be Afraid.


Practical Steps for Spiritual Warfare:

  • Daily Prayer: Prayer is your lifeline to God. Make it a habit to pray every morning, afternoon and night, asking for His protection, guidance, and strength.

  • Use the Word of God: The Bible is called the “sword of the Spirit” for a reason. Memorize verses that remind you of God’s promises and declare them over your life, especially when you feel under attack.

  • Guard Your Mind: Be mindful of what you consume—stop listening to secular music, negative media, foolish conversations. Spiritual battles often begin in the mind, so be diligent about feeding it with truth and wisdom from God’s Word.


3. The Holy Spirit: Your Helper and Guide

When you became a believer, God’s Spirit, known as the Holy Spirit, comes to live inside you. The Holy Spirit is your guide, comforter, and helper, and He empowers you to live out your faith.


What the Holy Spirit Does:

  • Guides you into truth (John 16:13). The Holy Spirit will help you understand God’s Word and will.

  • Convicts you when you’re off track, helping you recognize what is right from wrong.

  • Empowers you to overcome challenges and live in a way that honors God.

  • Gives you peace and comfort, especially when you’re facing difficulties.


How to Connect with the Holy Spirit:

  • Invite Him In: Start each day by inviting the Holy Spirit to fill you fresh. Simply say, “Holy Spirit, take over control and guide me today. I need your wisdom, strength, and peace.”

  • Listen and Respond: When you feel the Holy Spirit prompting you—whether it’s to encourage someone, avoid a situation, or spend time in prayer—listen and obey. The more you follow His lead, the stronger your connection will be.


4. Find a Church and Surround Yourself with Believers

Christianity isn’t meant to be lived in isolation. Community is essential. Finding a church and surrounding yourself with other believers helps you grow, stay accountable, and find support in your journey.


Why Church Matters:

  • Teaching and Learning: Church is where you can hear teachings from the Bible, which helps you understand God’s Word better and live a victorious life.

  • Worshiping with others helps you focus on God and builds your faith.

  • You’ll meet other believers who can encourage you, pray for you, and walk alongside you.

  • Service: Many churches offer opportunities to serve others, which is an important part of living out your faith.


A community of godly friends loving and supporting one another

Practical Tip: Visit a few local churches to find one that feels right for you. Look for a church that teaches the Bible clearly, has a welcoming community, and offers ways to connect with others, like small groups or Bible studies.


5. Be Open to the Power of Baptism

Baptism is an outward symbol of an inward change. When you’re baptized, you’re publicly declaring that you’ve decided to follow Jesus. It’s a symbolic act where you’re immersed or dipped in water, to represent washing away of your old life and the start of your new life in Christ.


Why It Matters: Baptism doesn’t save you, but it’s a powerful declaration of your faith and obedience to Jesus’ command (Matthew 28:19). It’s also a beautiful moment of committing your life publicly and identifying with Jesus’ death, burial, and resurrection.


Practical Tip: If you haven’t been baptized yet, talk to a pastor or leader at your church. They’ll help you understand the importance of baptism and guide you through the process.



6.Welcome Your New Identity in Christ: Live as a Child of God

When you’re born again, you’re forgiven and adopted into God’s family. You become a child of God, with all the rights and privileges that come with it. Romans 8:15-17 says, “The Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by Him we cry, ‘Abba, Father.’”


This new identity is powerful. You’re no longer defined by your past mistakes, insecurities, or the labels the world puts on you. You are who God says you are: beloved, chosen, redeemed, and equipped. Living out of this identity changes everything. Instead of trying to prove yourself to others, you can rest in the knowledge that you are deeply loved by God.


Practical Steps for Embracing Your Identity:

  • Affirm Your Identity Daily: Begin each day by speaking God’s truths over yourself. For example, “I am a child of God. I am chosen. I am loved. I am more than a conqueror.” You need to believe it.

  • Reject Lies: Anytime you hear a voice that tells you you’re not good enough, or you’re unworthy, remind yourself that those are lies from the enemy. Replace them with God’s truth.



7. Recognize That Faith Is a Journey

Being a Christian doesn’t mean life will suddenly become easy or that you’ll always feel close to God. There will be ups and downs, questions, and even doubts. And that’s okay. Faith is a journey, not a destination.


What This Means for You: There will be days when your faith feels strong and days when you struggle. Keep moving forward. God is patient, and He’s with you through every step. When you fall, don’t give up—God’s grace is always available.


Practical Tip: Stay consistent in reading the Bible, praying, and connecting with other believers, even when you don’t feel like it. Faith grows through being consistent, not being perfect.



8. Understand the Importance of Obedience and Growth

Being a follower of Jesus means letting Him shape you into the person He created you to be. Obedience is following God’s instructions, trusting God’s plan for your life and aligning your actions with His will.


What Obedience Looks Like:

  • Loving others, even when it’s hard.

  • Avoiding things that draw you away from God (gossip, immorality, negativity, dishonesty, addictions, lust, pride, envy, hatred, jealousy, rebellion, haughtiness).

  • Making choices that reflect God’s character and values. Learn more about the character of God in the Holy Bible.


Practical Steps for Daily Obedience: When you are faced with a choice, ask yourself, “Does this honor God?” Obedience may not always be easy, but it brings true peace and growth.

Obedience starts with listening. Make space each day to ask, “God, what do you want me to do today?” When you sense God leading you, act on it—even if it’s uncomfortable. Obedience often requires stepping out in faith.

The more you align with God’s ways, the more you’ll experience the fullness of life He has for you.


9. Find Purpose: Live with Divine Intention and Adventure

One of the greatest gifts of being born again is discovering your purpose. You weren’t created by accident; God has a unique calling for your life. Ephesians 2:10 says, “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”


Purpose brings meaning to your life. Instead of going around aimlessly, you wake up each day with a sense of mission. You start to see your talents, passions, and experiences as tools God can use to impact others and glorify Him.


Steps to Discover Your Purpose:

  • Seek God’s Guidance: Ask God in prayer to reveal your purpose. Trust that He will guide you step by step.

  • Pay Attention to Your Passions and Gifts: Often, your purpose is connected to the things you’re naturally passionate about and the skills God has given you.

  • Be Open to God’s Timing: Purpose unfolds over time. Be patient, and trust that God is working in every season, even if you don’t see the full picture yet.


10. Overcome Negative Thoughts and Anxiety

One of the most significant changes that happens when you’re born again is the transformation of your mind. Romans 12:2 encourages us, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” When you’re born again, God begins a process of renewing your mind, helping you break free from patterns of fear, negativity, and self-doubt that you have been conditioned to.


Practical Steps for a Renewed Mind:

  • Meditate on Scripture: Find verses that speak to your specific struggles and meditate on them. Let God’s Word replace the lies with truth.

  • Practice Gratitude: Start each day by thanking God for at least three things. Gratitude shifts your focus from worries to God’s goodness.

  • Take Every Thought Captive: Whenever a negative thought arises, don’t let it stay around for long. Challenge it with God’s truth.


11. Keep Growing and Stay Hungry for God

Faith is not a “one-and-done” deal. The longer you walk with God, the more you’ll grow and mature in your faith. Keep that hunger alive—stay curious, keep asking questions, and never stop seeking more of God.


How to Keep Growing:

  • Study the Bible deeply: Go beyond just reading. Meditate on Scripture, memorize verses, and explore different parts of the Bible.

  • Pray continually: Make prayer a daily habit. Talk to God throughout your day, not just in the morning or before bed.

  • Surround yourself with people who inspire you: Seek out mentors, read books, and watch sermons that deepen your understanding of faith.


Practical Tip: Set goals for your spiritual growth. It could be reading a chapter of the Bible every day or attending a Bible study once a week, keep moving forward. Your relationship with God is a journey, and there’s always more to discover.


Are You Ready for the Ultimate Reset?

If you’re longing for a new beginning, if you’re tired of carrying the weight of your past and just want to be free, know that Jesus offers you that chance. He’s not asking for perfection; He’s asking for surrender. He wants to reset you back to the original, pure, beautiful version of yourself that He created. And in doing that, He’ll cleanse you from the inside out, and also equip you with a purpose that will bring meaning to every single day.


I’ve been on both sides, and I can tell you—this new life, this reset, this “factory settings” version of me—is worth everything I left behind.


I’m no longer searching for meaning because I’ve found it in Him. I finally understand when the Lord Jesus said "I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry again. Whoever believes in me will never be thirsty" (John 6:35).


He filled that void/emptiness in my heart, its the same void we all feel and try to fill with the things of this world.


I’m no longer haunted by my past because He erased it. And each day, I get to walk with the One who loves me more deeply than I can imagine. Christ Jesus is my everything.


So, are you ready for the upgrade? The reset? The fresh start that only God can give? Take that step. Say yes to being born again, and watch as God transforms your life in ways you never thought possible.

As always, remain faithful. I love you

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